Wonderful Wednesday

154790_10150814148590102_775010101_9330616_1720169610_nYou know its a Wonderful Wednesday when you get to Sleep late and then go get a Full Body Massage for an Hour!¬† Oh My Goodness!! I had an awesome lazy late lunch then trained One Client at 6pm… that was My day!

So I’m kicked back in the chair with my laptop in hand checking emails & chatting on FB, I go to put my foot on the floor & there is a Big Freaking Spider right beside my foot!! OMG!! I Hate Spiders!! That would have been an Instant Heart Attack & a 911 Rescue Call lol… Needless to say, He Did Not Make It Out Alive!

Be thankful for the little things people, for some little things could bring about an untimely End lol.

Have a Blessed Night Everybody! Hope I at least gave you a little chuckle to end your day! Smooches!

Season’s of a Lifetime

To Become the Person  You Were Meant To Be

To Become the Person You Were Meant To Be

Let me start this by saying that if you have never met me in person then what you see on Facebook or any of my other social media profiles, is the very Positive, Optimistic, Happy, Motivational & Inspiring person. Or at least I hope that is what you get from my posts ūüôā¬† What you may or may not pull from my posts, unless you do personally know me, is that I am a Very Matter of Fact, Blunt, to the point person, with no Edit button or filter.¬† Especially when I am speaking my mind on something that I am passionate about lol.¬† So with that being said, what I am about to write is strictly from my own personal experiences and nobody else’s. This is the only “Warning” label that will appear because this will be very candid and uncut.¬† If you read it and feel as I am talking about “You”, the probability that you are going thru the same things I have already gone thru is 210% True.¬† But believe me when I say I am only speaking about me at the moment in this post.¬† I would appreciate your thoughts and/or comments at the end and I Thank You in advance for taking your Time that you cant get back to come check out my world for just a few moments.

I am a firm believer that Everything in our lives happen for a reason. There are no accidents or coincidences. People that come into our life, come into it for a reason.¬† Some of those reason’s will last a Season and some will last a Lifetime. I am sure that we ALL have heard that saying at some point in our life. I am speaking mostly to the ladies here because, of course I am one & only know about how I feel lol, but if it strikes the men who read as a truth then hey, I have done my job well with this post then ūüôā

When people come into our life, especially at a very difficult time, and they help us (or in our eyes), sometimes, we feel as if that person “Saved” our lives by being our friend during that dark time.¬† I went thru a very bad bout of depression a few years back. I was NOT Happy with my life, my body, my health, my job, generally just waking up and breathing pissed me off to no end. That was a very real thought.¬† Another very real thought was I just wanted to go to sleep and Never Wake Up.¬† I did not think any body would care, nor would they miss me.¬† Why?¬† Because, I know that if I knew me and was around me for 5 min, I would Not want to be any longer than that.¬† I was a Very Angry person, especially with myself.¬† I had every intention of taking a whole bottle of sleeping pills one afternoon.¬† Just going to sleep and never waking up. I Never said a word to anyone about my intentions.¬† But a friend called me that day. He got in my ASS. I don’t remember the whole conversation, but I remember very vividly, he said this, “I don’t know WTF is wrong with you but you need to get your head out of your Ass and get yourself together and now!¬† You are Not this co-dependent needy ass person that you are acting like and you are Not acting like the Tammy that I Fell In Love With! So WTFE is wrong with you…you need to fix it and right now! Because I can and will make a road trip to come kick your ass if that is what needs to happen.”

Needless to say, I burst into tears, told him he made me cry & asked if that made him happy? He said Good because I am not done yet and another thing…dahdahdahdah yada yada yada… was all I heard.¬† Because I knew Every Single Word he was saying was “TRUE“.¬† It Hurt like Hell! I cried uncontrollably while he continued to tell me what an Ass I was being.¬† It made me Soooooo Angry at myself but in a different way.¬† I will say though, before the end of the conversation, he made sure he made me laugh and asked me what was wrong.¬† I don’t really remember much of the convo at that point but I do know I Did Not tell him what my plans were before he had called. When we got off the phone I went and flushed the bottle of sleeping pills down the toilet.¬† I got in the shower and cried for about an hr. I got myself together and slowly started making changes in my life, one day at a time, to make me at least start to LIKE me again.

I bare my soul about this part in my life to get you to the topic of people come into our lives for a reason. That person is/was a dear friend of mine. We had been romantically involved on & off over the yrs until I met the Awesome man that I am in Love with now (and will be getting married soon. YaY!)¬† Until then though, I held on to him Desperately.¬† In my mind, he was the 1 that “I” felt like Saved my Life that one dark day. What I have come to realize since then, is that he was Open to Let God USE HIM to save my life. He did Not Save Me. God Saved Me. And I didn’t have a relationship with God then.¬† I didn’t think he would love me or care about me, much less, save me.¬† I used my friend as a safety net.¬† An excuse Not to let other men get close to me.¬†¬† I was afraid that, if I did, I would lose my life line. The “What If” this doesn’t work out and I need him, he will not be there and then what?

What I have learned, and come to realize is this, GOD is the Only Life Line I Need. He was the one who Saved Me Then, Who saves me Every Single day that I wake up Breathing, which I am happy about doing these days by the way lol.¬† What I had to realize is that this person was only suppose to be in my life for a Specific Reason and only for a Season.¬† I had romanticized our relationship, (out of my own fear of being alone and/or the dark places I was saved from) to think that we were “Meant to be together“.¬† Ha! what an idiot thought that was lol.¬† He was used, in more ways than one, by God to Save my life.¬† To show me how to open my heart to Love again. To open myself to Love Again. To Open my Eyes to See Again. To lead me to the place where I would meet my soul mate who I was “Meant to Spend My Life With”.

I say all of this ladies, in hopes that you understand, that just because a man Helps you through a tough time, it does Not necessarily mean that he is suppose to be in your life for a LIFETIME. He was here for a reason, that may, in fact, only¬† last a season. But please, do not let that man stay when you SEE ALL the signs (even if you don’t want to openly admit it to yourself) that he is Meant to Move On. Not because he doesn’t love or care about you, but because he has served his purpose in your life.¬† Do not hold on to someone or something out of Fear of the future.¬† Fear is Not Real, Fear is a Choice. That person that your holding onto is Toxic to your Progress and Hinders you from becoming ALL that God has made you to be. Not because they themselves are toxic people, they are just toxic to your future, because they are Not Meant To Stay In Your Life Any More.

So Take the time to say goodbye in your heart.¬† Whatever that means to you. Whether that’s crying it out, writing in a journal, writing them a letter and saying thank you for what you did, but I know its time for us to move on, take care. You are not doing it for them, you are doing it for You! I pray that you understand what all this means and that you receive it the way it is meant and it helps you in some way. I am not saying it will happen over night or that it will be easy.¬† Because, like ALL Change, it will probably not be easy at all.¬† But I can promise you this, If you ask God to Help you cut the ties that are binding you, He Will Set You Free! He Will heal the Every Broken piece of your heart and soul all the way down into the deepest cracks that you probably didn’t even know existed.¬† And when he is done, you will be able to Breathe Again, let out a sigh of relief, look up and say…. Thank You God, I know You Got Me Now!

Prayer ? Do we Know how ?

I had a really rough night last night .

I have been wrestling for two days with something “I” wanted to write about .

After my night in prayer , I was shown that I “will” be writing about what God wants written .

So :¬† let’s talk about our prayer life .

Mine was nothing but turmoil last night as I continually told God what “I” was trying to “accomplish” and asking him to bless my meager efforts with pen and paper .

And that is how our prayer life often works : asking God to bless what “we” want to do . No thought of anything but our own interest or dreams .

After all ; we all know how to best glorify our Lord . Right ?

That’s a really good joke¬† isn’t it ?

We can never make God’s word “whole” through our own wisdom .

And that is the lesson my Lord taught me last night ; turn it over to him and trust him and his wisdom and power

But here is also the problem for us mere mortals ; turning  EVERYTHING over to God .

I bet everybody thought we would get through this with out  me quoting C.S. Lewis !!

No such luck !

I am now reading the Screw Tape Letters and came across this little jewel that I must share :¬† ”¬† Thanks to processes ,that Satan set at work in man centuries ago ,they find all but impossible to believe in the unfamiliar while the familiar is before their eyes .” Paraphrased

And there is Satan’s opening : our inability to turn “all” over to our Lord and rest from our labors at that point .

Our nature says that God might not realize the true enormity of the problem we have brought to him .

Or He doesn’t understand the “urgency ” of our “request”.

Now we get to the two problems with our prayer life : #1 -Urgency  ,#2 -Request .

Urgency ?  Impossible to get my #2 Combo to the drive through window fast enough !

And how often do we treat Our God like the poor girl manning the window at the local McDonald’s ; “Did you have to kill the cow ? ‘, “Don’t you know I am already running late?”

And the “request “?–There is a real laugh !

“Request ?” —Let’s try “commands ” .

All I really need from you Lord is your blessings !

That is how prayer works if “I” am in charge : speedy , with the mustard and ketsup just so -so !

Let’s look at God’s way .

Let’s go all the way back to the beginning : Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden .

All that Beauty : Something so awesome that my feeble mind can barely comprehend the beauty that is before my eyes !

Visualize Adam and Eve walking With their God through the Garden in the cool of the morning !

Oh to have been on that walk !

Can you hear them call Him Abba ?

And that is how prayer should be : approaching God as our Father !

Knowing that above all else ,He loves us and will never harm us .

And now we get to my Daughter .

Laura may get tired of being my example ,but she is a beautiful example of prayer .

Laura was around 3 years old when she ran through the kitchen door screaming for her Daddy .

KILL EM DADDY ! KILL EM !.

And in each hand my Daughter was holding a Yellow Jacket .

They had stung my baby !

And she Had come running to her Daddy .

She had brought her problem to her father ,knowing that I could handle it .

One question for us now : How much more does Our Father care about the “yellow jackets ” in our life ?

There is the true prayer that our Father Wants from his Children .

God bless

Roger .

Love Appreciation

Life is not about each moment...But the Moments that Take Your Breath Away

Life is not about each moment…But the Moments that Take Your Breath Away

I wanna take a moment to talk about Love and Appreciation.¬† We all go through relationships on our road of life.¬† Some of them Good, some Bad, some Terrible and heart wrenching and the most Awesome of them all, the Love where you don’t think you will ever come down off of cloud 9,999,999,999 lol.¬† At the ripe old age of 46, I can tell you from personal experience I have been through each of those Love’s More than once.

This goes for men and women, even though I can only speak from the woman’s perspective.¬† As I mentioned in an earlier post about relationships titled “What Are You Allowing” I talked about how so many people grow up in single parent homes and the fathers, for whatever reason, are not a part of a child’s life.¬† To teach the boys to be men and how to treat a lady when they get older.¬† Nor to teach us girls, how we should be treated as ladies by a man.¬† I said “What you choose to Allow, you Give Permission to Exist“.

Today, I want to talk about the love that has you on top of the world.¬† I don’t care how great and wonderful your relationship is or how Awesome your partner makes you feel.¬† At some point in the relationship you are gonna hit a bump in the road or even head on into a brick wall.¬† That is part of life.¬† There is no running from it and No relationship is perfect from beginning to end.¬† When that rough time comes what are you gonna do?¬† Are you gonna say “Screw This” and give up even though you have been on the proverbial “Cloud 9” for a year or 2 or are you gonna dig your heals in and Love each other through it?

I am a Huge fan of R&B music, so needless to say I probably know just about every love song, break up song and baby making song they play on the radio & even more that they don’t that friends have turned me on to.¬† But there are a couple that just speak to me.¬† One that I’ve been listening to lately by Justin Timberlake, Mirrors.¬† He says “I don’t wanna lose tonight, I am looking right at the other half of me…….Show me How to fight for Love….coming back to you was easy once I figured it out, you were right here all the long“.¬† Yes I know I missed a Lot of words in there but I got the most important ones to get the point I am trying to make lol.

First, you need to figure out are you Really In Love, because if you’re not, what is the point in being together?¬† Staying together just because you don’t want to be alone is NOT the right decision (Please refer to your previous relationship baggage to figure out Why this is a horrible Idea).¬† Now, if you are in Love and you know deep down in your gut there is just not another person on this planet for you, then you have to Dig your heals in and Fight to hold on.¬† Like JT said in his song, “Show Me How To Fight For Love“.¬† Most guys don’t know how to fight for Love! Hell, most of them honestly don’t know How to express/show their love much less fight for it. (Sorry fellas *Shrugs*)¬† We can ALL be a pain in the behind.¬† There is gonna be things that you do that he hates and things he does that you hate.¬† Period!¬† The problem is that we (and Ladies I am talking to you right here) tend to over react on the little stuff so when the big stuff comes up…O-M-G!! Mt. Saint Helen’s has just erupted and you think there is No coming back from that, even though, just the day before, you were on cloud 999,999,999 and this was the man of your dreams.

Sometimes, you have to just Love each other through it.¬† You may not like them very much at the moment, but You Love them Way more than you dislike them.¬† Before you throw in the towel, I want you to do something for me.¬† Take a deep breath, let it out nice and slow.¬† Now, grab a pen & piece of paper.¬† I want you to write down Everything you APPRECIATE about your significant other. Their eyes, their hair, the way the walk, the sound of their voice, that they like to snuggle, He takes the trash out without you asking, She has dinner ready when you come home, the house is always clean, random text messages saying “I was just thinking of you and wanted to say I Love You” or a random picture message of what she has on waiting for you to get home (vavavavoom!)…you get the idea. Over the next 30 days, I want you to write at least 5 things Everyday that you APPRECIATE about your significant other.

I promise you this, that if it’s a Deep Real True Love, Then that list is going to be long and nothing else matters.¬† Know that it’s okay to be wrong.¬† It’s okay to say your sorry even if you know that you were not wrong.¬† It’s okay to ask for forgiveness even if it is something little.¬† But Always, Always Always…Say Thank You for Loving Me even when I wasn’t very loveable. Always Say, I Love You! Even when it hurts, your angry, upset or whatever.¬† Because even though things aren’t exactly the way you planned them out in your head a thousand times, you still Love them and more than anything else They Need to Know That in the Darkest Hours of your relationship.¬† Yesterday is a memory, tomorrow is a mystery, today is all we have so don’t let the breaths of each moment slip away when there is an opportunity for it to be turned into a Moment that Takes Your Breath Away!¬† That is when it ALL Becomes Worth it!¬† Show them how to fight for Love!

Hope this touches someones heart as it was weighing heavy on mine and needed to come out tonight!  Thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule to hear my heart tonight!  #BeBlessed

 

Do You Admire Your Boss?

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This post is spurred by another blog that I read by Scott Dinsmore at Live Your Legend

Live your legend is all about finding what you love to do and figuring out a way to make money at it so that you can be happy at your “J-O-B”.¬† Actually, most people, over 80% of the population to be exact, hate their job and the career that they chose to follow.¬† People have this lie planted in their head that a “JOB” is Not suppose to be fun or that your Not suppose to enjoy the work that you do!¬† So they put their head down and they Grind it out, Day after Day after Day, Year after Year after Year.¬† Becoming a workaholic in most cases.¬† All to become what the “World” says is the definition of “Success“.

You think that if you work your Boo-Tay off to make all the money you can and buy the nice house, the car, have the wife (husband) and kids (that you never get to see, by the way, because your working 100+hrs a week to maintain that so-called¬† “World Success”) and keep telling yourself, “When I retire, I will take time to be happy then and enjoy life“.¬† Which brings me back to the Live your Legend blog post, which was appropriately titled, “Do You Want to Be Your Boss?“. (Which is obviously the inspiration for my title, Thanks Scott! lol)

There was something that he said in there that Really just smacked me in the head and I have been thinking about it on and off all day.¬† “Happiness not spent today, does not equal more Happiness Tomorrow.¬† If you think that you will be less stressed, less conflicted and less disenchanted at a higher level, you’re in for a Nasty surprise”.

Now, let’s think about that for a minute. I mean really think about it.¬† Think about your boss.¬† Do you like them? Do you Admire them? Do they inspire you to be better? Do they motivate you to want to do the best job you can so that you can better yourself in the company or are they micromanaging you trying to keep you where you are because they Hate their job to? (and we all know misery loves company) Here is the big question…. Do you Really Want to Be Your Boss?¬† If you were offered his/her job tomorrow, would you take it?¬† That means, ALL the headaches, stresses, hours, time away from home and family that comes along with the pay check he/she is getting.¬† Now, be honest with yourself, because you have to live with your answer and so does your family not me, Do You Want to Be Your Boss? Do you Really want that promotion? Do you even Like what it is that you do?

Lets get a little deeper since I am Obviously trying to make you think Today!¬†¬†If money were no object and you could do ANYTHING in the world you wanted to do…. Starting Tomorrow…. what would it be?¬† Would you go into work tomorrow and be happy about it.¬† Doing the best job that you could do and go as far as you could go in that company?¬† Or would you say, “Take this Job & Shove It!

If you Love what you do for a living, Hey, by all means Keep Doing it!¬† If you are excited to go to work and are Happy every morning when that alarm goes off because you get to do what you love to do everyday and get paid for it, then this blog post is NOT for you! Congrats on being 1 of the 20% or less.¬† But, if you are 1 of the 80%+ that Hate what they do…. then maybe, just maybe, now is the time for you to figure out an EXIT plan for your current situation. (And I don’t mean out of the 3rd floor window either lol)

Take a few minutes and really think about what it is that you would love to do that would make you happy.¬† Then write it down.¬† The next thing you do is put a pen to paper and figure out what it would take to make that become a reality.¬† Google it, do your research, find a way to make it happen.¬† Do Not Let Fear Grip You and keep you from your dreams.¬† Like I said in my previous blog “Forget About How..Just Do It”, your Dream is on the other side of the fog, you only have to go 3 feet at a time, but you Have To Do It! Fear Only Gets Loud when You’re Doing Something That Matters!

I have no idea where you are in life, I don’t even know you, but I do know how I felt when I was doing a Job that I hated! (that is another story for another blog!) I knew that I had to find a way out or it would kill me if I stayed.¬† Now that may be a little overly dramatic for you, but that is how I felt in that job.¬† I quit, busted my ass studying and in less than 3 months passed my personal trainer certification exam at the age of 44! A Light Switch Moment Dream, that if I am 100% honest with myself (and you) I was not sure that I could/would achieve it when I started out on that journey.¬† When I got my score, I asked the girl 3 times if I had passed because I Never thought I could do it.¬† When I got back out to my car, I burst into tears.¬† Big sobbing tears of joy flowing down so hard that I almost could not breathe.¬† I think I cried for what seemed like an eternity at the time, but was probably a good 5 minutes (or less) in reality.¬† I Did It! I Passed My Test! Not only did I pass, but I Passed with a score of 90!!! I have been training for 6+ years now & I absolutely LOVE what I do! I am now also a Transformation Life Coach, Public Speaker and soon to be Published Author!¬† I turned 50 in 2017 and I feel better today than I have in my entire life with Dreams and Goals that will make the world a better place for us all! This was ALL possible, because I Made a Choice! A Choice to Want to become More! To be Better than I was the Previous 44 years of my life!

I said ALL of that to say this to you, If I, a 44 yr old Mother of 2 and GG of 3, can make her Dream Job a Reality….then You Can Too! Believe in yourself and Never let anyone tell you that you “Can’t” or that your crazy or not good enough.¬† When other people start telling you that your crazy, trust me, that means you are on the right path!¬† Walk, Jog, Run, whatever you have to do!¬† Go around them, over them, under them or thru them, but Never Quit!¬† You are in control of your Destiny! You are the Creator of Whatever Life it is that you Choose to Create!

I would love to hear if you love your job and/or your boss? Or even better, Answer the question, “If money were no object and you could start your dream job tomorrow, what would that look like for you and your family?¬† Leave it in the comments below and lets chat for a moment!

I hope that I have at least inspired you to believe in YOUR own power a little more on this Beautiful Day! Thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule to hear my heart!  Be Blessed!  Tammy

Enter the Challenge

So, I am going through my “Ridiculously Out of Control” Email tonight.¬† I see an email titled “NaBloPoMo“.¬† I am a little more than curious about what that means, so I open it up to see that it’s a Blog writing contest for the month of November called “National Blog Posting Month” through Blogher.com.¬† Basically it is issuing a challenge to write a Blog post every single day for 30 days during the month of November.

Now I am new to the whole blogging thing, but I have found that I really do enjoy it and I want to write more.  Soooooo, what this challenge is doing is going to push me to Write Every Single Day for the month of November.  There are no rules as far as number of words, how long, how short or whatever!  Which is Really Awesome for me lol.

So I am just sending this post out to let you know that you will be hearing from me Every Single Day This Month!! Woot Woot!  Now, that will do one of 2 things to you when you read this, Excite you or Scare the Hell out of you lol! I hope it is the 1st and not the latter but either way, I know that it will be fun, interesting and a Challenge that is Completely Possible for me to do.

I have been feeling the urge to write a lot lately and have let “Life” get in the way of the “Divine inspiration” that is nudging me to share my thoughts with the world.¬† With that being said, I will embrace my inner writer and post something Everyday for the next 30 days.¬† I hope that you enjoy my challenge as much as I will (Straight Face with eyebrow raised lol) and that you will engage with me, enjoy it with me, participate with me and I hope, most of all, that you will help Support Me in this Self Development Challenge as we go along in this month.

Have a Great Night & Enjoy the rest of your Weekend! #BeBlessed